I appreciate everyone that has reached out to me after reading my last post. I was very reluctant to put myself out there, but it has proven to be an inspired move. My eyes have been opened to resources and help that I wouldn't have known before. Thank you for cheering me on.
Thanks to a dear friend, I am currently reading this:
It is a gospel centered approach to the 12 step program set forth in alcohol anonymous and it meant to help overcome compulsive/addictive behaviors. After reading one page I finally felt understood. I felt like there was hope! I share something that struck me from the introduction. The author shares her own story and says that in overcoming her own addition to food she used the 12 step program. However, when she came to the chapter titled, "To the agnostic" she skipped it since she was an "active" church goer. However, a few years later, after a relapse, she went back to the steps and found that this chapter applied to her perfectly. She says, "I had not come to know the Father or His Son, Jesus Christ. I began to realize the term 'agnostic' - which applies to someone who only hopes God exist, but doesn't feel they can say they know - was actually true of me...I had to admit I turned to all kinds of other things for comfort and solace and strength to get through my days - things like food, money, and compulsive working..."
I asked myself, am I ever agnostic? Do I hope that God is out there to help me, but don't really believe he can? Do I even try to ask for the help that I need from Him? In Sunday school awhile back someone said, "We say a lot of blessings at our house, but we don't always say prayers." I have realized that while I may be in the habit of reading, saying my prayers, and going to church, it doesn't always mean that I am tapping into the power available from God. Going through the motions does not guarantee divine guidance, and certainly will not help you solve life's hard problems.
So I would ask you to ask yourself, "Are there days that I am agnostic?" I'd love to hear your thoughts.
5 comments:
I feel agnostic a lot. i feel like I can do the motions but I can't always feel them. It's all part of our learning experience though. I know what I should do but keeping that in my head and actions is a lot harder. And it is for everyone I think. I'm happy you found that book and that it's helping you:)I should read it for my addiction to gossiping:)
Amen! All the time.
Trish, this search of your has been good for me. And this post, I can relate to. I find myself this way especially with my unactivity. Even more so than believeing but feeling GOd can't help, I feel (subconciously) that I don't deserve the help.
I just read your previous post and truely admire your courage and determination. Weve talked about this before and it is a hard and constant road! I look forward to your inspiration and progress because hopefully I can learn from you. Can't wait to run with you again so maybe we can lift each other up in this battle. The word of wisdom truely applies to eating things that are good for you. Your Amazing and a very dear and life long friend of mine. Maybe we should keep each other in check. oh and I want to come and see your house soon also!
There are definitely day I feel agnostic. Those are the hardest to get through, and it is always when I feel I am too busy. I loved this post. You are awesome Trisha and I love you!
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